6 Keys for Great Marriage Communication
Posted by Chuck on February 7, 2010 · 6 Comments
In ALL marriages communication is the key to happiness!
By learning to use these six communication keys, you will enrich your marriage and move your relationship to a whole new level.
My parents never learned to communicate. Oh, they talked a lot – shouted and argued even more – but they never learned the keys for truly talking and listening to each other. Their relationship ended with a bitter divorce, following twenty years of marital chaos, and resulted in a shattered family and emotionally wounded children. It didn’t have to happen.
During the past thirty (30) years it has been our privilege to counsel numerous couples as they sought to enrich (and often to save) their marriages. In all of these relationships, there existed a primary ‘issue’ or challenge such as financial problems, infidelity, boredom, etc.
In each marriage the root cause for disharmony
was the lack of successful communication.
In some cases, one dominant spouse would attempt to change the other through persuasive argument. In others, the spouse with the loudest voice would ’win’ the argument ending with the quieter spouse in tears. This didn’t have to happen.
In each of these marriages, as the couples learned to put into practice the following ‘6 Keys for Great Marriage Communication’, the relationship improved and resulted in a much stronger marriage. Once they learned to communicate effectively, the couples were able to work through the underlying issues and resolve them.
Over the next six days, I will be posting a series of six sub-articles, each one providing details for one of the following ‘6 Keys for Great Marriage Communication’:
- Key #1: Hold Hands
- Key #2: Think Before You Speak and Re-format Your Words
- Key #3: Choose The Right Time To Talk
- Key #4: Learn To Listen
- Key #5: Schedule A ‘Talking Appointment’
(Though this sounds similar to key #3, it is actually quite different.) - Key #6: One Topic Is Enough
These ‘6 Keys for Great Marriage Communication’ are condensed from a chapter of our forthcoming book: MARRIED … AND ENJOYING IT! (30 Years of Marriage Enrichment Secrets)
Thanks! I look forward to reading your sub articles and your book. I realized today that my husband and I are the happiest couple we know. I thank God for that. We really benefit from positive encouragement and warm touches. Hugs, lately have melted us into unity. I appreciate your 6 keys for communication because that is our area where we depend on God the most because we are at our weakest.
Hi Daphne, Thanks for reading. Like you, Renee and I know so many couples that are really struggling and our heart goes out to them. We are convinced that there are many marriage-breakers in our culture today. Marriages are successful because couples work at them. These 6 keys are vitally important for making communication work in marriage. They aren’t hard to learn, but they really aren’t taught anywhere. I wish the school system would make this a priority.
We look forward to finishing our new book real soon. We have been blessed and fortunate to build a great marriage over the past 30 years, and are excited about the opportunity to share what we have learned with others!
Towards the Best Marriages, Chuck
A great list, communication is so much a key in a marriage. I’ve been constantly trying to improve but at times there are breakdowns.
Thanks for the list and see you at pb.com
Thanks Dipankar, I appreciate you taking the time to stop in and read. You are correct, ‘constantly trying to improve’ is a necessity. As we give a bit each day, our marriages will just get better. Blessings to you, your spouse, and that beautiful baby!
Chuck
Oooh that one. “Choose the right time to talk” – Don’t I know about that one. I adore and worship my wonderful husband, who is not just a great man but really a saint. It has been an interesting journey to be married, and I never thought to read about better ways to be married, but you now have given me a reason. Great stuff!
Hi Farnoosh, Thanks for stopping by! Isn’t it wonderful to have a spouse that is truly our soul-mate, best friend and confidant. After being married for 30 years, Renee and I know the value of continual marriage enrichment. Reading the thoughts and ideas of others in this area has always been a blessing to us and we continue to grow and learn.
Thanks for sharing and stop back soon.
Blessings! Chuck